If you see a swarm, you can vacuum them up. It’s the nuclear football of fly removal. It’s loud, it’s messy, and it feels amazing. Just be warned: if you don’t empty the canister immediately, they’ll crawl out and plot revenge. You’ll hear them buzzing at night, whispering about your unfinished compost. So empty that canister into a sealed bag and toss it in the dumpster like you’re disposing of evidence.
And if none of this works? Buy a carnivorous plant. They’re called Drosera, or sundews. They’re sticky, beautiful, and will eat those flies with patient, alien glee. Let nature fight your war for you. Plus, it’s a great conversation starter for people who don’t realize you’re a broken person living in a fly fortress. Good luck. You’ve got this.
