Imagine the boardroom meeting: “Right chaps, our research says customers think we’re boring. What do we do?” Someone probably shouted, “What if we rename ourselves after a man who once mailed a herring to the Queen?” And everyone clapped. WHSmith’s CEO later admitted in a leaked memo that they chose “Tg Jones” because it sounds like a “cool indie band” that sells “edgy pencils.”
Here’s the kicker: the change is only until the end of the month. That means every time you see a “Tg Jones” sign, you’re witnessing a temporary, legally binding identity crisis. It’s like when your dad puts on a Hawaiian shirt for a barbecue and then forgets he’s not on holiday. The workers hate it—I saw a cashier today who looked like she was being forced to wear a mascot head for a toothpaste brand.
But wait, there’s more. WHSmith hasn’t just swapped letters; they’ve physically replaced all their staff badges with ones that say “Jones’s Helper.” One poor employee told me, “I’ve had four customers today ask if I’m related to Tom Jones. One woman tried to get me to sing ‘Delilah’ for a refund on a magazine.” That’s the power of a name change—it turns a quiet newsagents into a chaotic, interactive theatre.
Alas WH Smith you’re now TG Jones | rossgazette.com
What Does Tg Jones Actually Sell?
Good news: you can still buy everything you’d normally get at WHSmith—jumbo pens, sudoku books, and those weirdly addictive sugar-free mints that taste like regret. The difference now is you’ll also find a “Tg Jones Corner” featuring official memorabilia: a life-sized cardboard cutout of Trevor, a book of his stamp-licking records, and a limited-edition tea towel with his face printed on it. It’s selling like hot cakes… which is weird, because it’s a tea towel.
Here’s a surprising fact: Trevor “Tg” Jones wasn’t even a real person. I’m joking—he was totally real. He died in 1978, and his family has a shrine to him in their garage. But the most shocking thing is that WHSmith paid £50,000 for the rights to use his name. That’s enough to buy 1,000,000 stamps, which is exactly the kind of mathematical joke Trevor would have appreciated.
